Sunday, September 28, 2008
economist/journalist jimmy smith talks economics on a haircut blog
jimmy smith has a solution for the economic problems now being faced. read on . . .
the economic mess this country is in . . . how did it happen?
jimmy smith remembers when folks began to favor foreign automobiles. they bought and they bought foreign cars . . . and where did the money go? overseas.
atlanta once had three automobile assembly plants and now atlanta has none. the once-big-three barely hang-on. chrysler needed a government bailout - only to be acquired by the germans.
growing up, jimmy smith remembers everyone had a favorite pickup truck - be it ford or chevy. and everyone had a loyalty to a gasoline brand - gulf, or texaco, or standard, or amoco, or sinclair, or pure, or . . . and how many brands remain? and how many that are left are american owned? not gulf (bp). not amoco (american oil company, right?) .
and all this foreign oil . . . watching our money go overseas to people that don't like us is not reasonable. and congress is impotent.
and beer, yes, beer . . . budweiser, and miller, and coors . . . now foreign owned. really, really, impotent.
millions of illegals consuming and consuming and consuming our resources - working for american wages - and sending their paychecks back home. that money is leaving the united states, too.
and all this buying goods from china - while american owned companies are forced to close . . .
americans are allowing the country's wealth to go out the window.
even the 7-11 is foreign owned (true, has been managed by foreigners forever). and a good humor bar is no longer american. and who makes nestle's crunch? hmmm . . .
and who brags on american cheese anymore?
now, jimmy smith, being ugandan, has no grudge against foreigners but enough is enough.
soon, our banks and investment houses will be owned by foreigners. we finance now with foreign capital. we buy foreign airplanes and all the while our aircraft industry falters.
our troops wear uniforms made in china. every decent piece of electronics comes from japan, jimmy smith remembers the first transistor radios from japan - made from an old tin can.
quite frankly, america is letting its wealth get away. the oil fiasco is significant case in point.
and now the crux of this post . . . what can be done?
jimmy smith sees parallels with the grand old game.
fix the game and fix the economy!
To wit:
(1) eliminate the designated hitter. things have not been right in this country since introduction of the designated hitter.
(2) no more wild card and 5-game playoff series. threw everything off kilter.
(3) regular season inter-league play must end. something is and has been wrong about this.
these simple steps, along with an entirely new congress and a re-written tax code, might right the wrongs now being suffered.
this is enough for now. jimmy smith will not go into what jimmy smith thinks about a braves season with 90 losses.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Plato's Place
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Sometimes I think all great thoughts have done been thunk ... and all great deeds done been did ...
Methinks it's as easy to become victimized by an overwhelming sense of irrelevance as it is by an unwarranted sense of relevance or self-importance ... I'm not sure which claims more victims, but there are a whole bunch of us that have tasted both ... that's for sure! ...
I've been thinking some about history ... The Christmas Stealer is writing about it ... The "Weed's" dad is teaching it ... and we're all living it, whether or not we so realize. And, from a baseball perspective, it appears that the Braves are it ... history.
What we are, we are ... what we've been is history ... what we're going to be ... and do ... is history waiting to be written.
As a result of what is, it's anticipated that massive changes are in store for the Braves ... we've already had some ... Tex and Kotsay are history ... we're seeing others ... and more are yet to come, or so methinks ... Conventional wisdom? ... bah, humbug! ... Dang, Double Dang! ...
Oh the humanity!! ...
There's nothing wrong with the Braves!! With the injuries, we could use some pitching perhaps, but we can win it all, mostly with what we've got ... it's not a matter of money ... the talent hasn't disappeared ... it's the heart, soul, leadership and those things above the neck that need fixing! We're still on the outside looking in ... but, close your eyes, use your ken ... there's nothing wrong with your vision, the picture's crystal clear ...
No, I don't think this is about baseball ... maybe, but rather what we've been ... what we are ... and what we can or will be. Mama always said ... and Daddy agreed ... first impressions are important, only in that they're hard to overcome ... and Daddy emphasized that it may take a man some time to establish his good reputation ... but only a moment to destroy it!
I can attest to the validity of that ... and so can many of you, including Bobby Cox and the Braves, methinks ... at least one or two
Understood perhaps by few, and rejected by those who are victims of an unwarranted sense of self, is that we ourselves are the ones most responsible for the perceptions held of us by others ...
Regarding the changing of perceptions held by others, Mama said "tain't easy McGee"
... after the 'Fibber' ... "but, telling folks they're wrong is a knife that ain't gonna cut soft butter, much less the cake" ...
... after the 'Fibber' ... "but, telling folks they're wrong is a knife that ain't gonna cut soft butter, much less the cake" ... Speaking of which ...
I can attest to that too ...
My abilities at self-expression are admittedly limited, and my bouts of "hoof-in-mouth" disease are infamous in some circles ... as are my attempts to explain my intent and/or rationale ... but, underpinning it all were and are good intentions, at least I so rationalize, and do certainly so hope ...
No, tain't easy McGee, but it's a ride that's been worth the taking, methinks ... and I'm appreciative of all who have tried to understand ...
I'm especially appreciative of the few crazies who have an understanding and appreciation of my distorted sense of humor and what I sometimes try to seriously convey ... and all the resulting friendships, goodness ... This isn't where I was headed ... how did I get here? ... or is it hear?
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Yes, the insights, imagination and wit of the Ugandan journalist of Cordele ... these are among my most favorite things. Like the wonderful Sarah Cannon said more often than Redundant Robert debased Bobby Cox, "Howdeeee! I'm jest so proud to be here!" with these two unbelievable talents ... and if that sounds contrived to you, then kiss my grits! No, I wouldn't wish my grits on anyone ... I don't eat 'em myself ... but, it's true, every word, give or take a lie or two!
Some may wonder, given his history, how it is that "sja" received total and unequivocal acceptance from Bob, journalist ... he who demanded strict adherence to a standard of behavior deemed unrealistic by most ... while others did not? Have you ever pondered that? ... I'm sure some have ... their conclusions would be most interesting ... Could be it's because we're so much alike ... or maybe that opposites attract .. I'll never tell ...
We're all unique ... it's just that John and Jimmy are so much more unique than others! It's hard to comprehend such creative genius ... but it's awfully easy to enjoy! ...
The original Bob, journalist was far more of a character than a mask ... though that was never understood, for better or for worse, regardless of repeated efforts to make it clear. However, the preoccupation with the importance of understanding meaning, motivation and intent rather than words was, and is, me. That I psychoanalyze is both a misconception and a joke ... indeed, it's something about which I know nothing ... but I do know the "why" is usually more important than the "what" ... as is effective use of the third eye and ear more important than the use of the other two, or so methinks.
Excluding those most severely victimized by an overwhelming sense of irrelevance, most of what the majority of us do is either agenda or self-interest driven ... that's both good and bad depending on how well it's kept in proper perspective, or so I honestly believe ... of course I do support some agendae, oppose others ... stand up, stand up I say ... for that in which you believe ... better that than staying seated, methinks ... the King of England and taxes you know.
It seems to me that among those many forces deep down inside that causes John to be what he is ... is a true blue, foursquare compulsion ... God didn't pass that around to everybody. For some, nay for many, friendships are a matter of convenience ... friends are but bedfellows based on agenda, and when the chips are down or adversity must be faced, those folks come up short, or at least those friendships become fractured ... not so with John ...
John has that compulsion while most of us do not ... perhaps he does because we don't ... I believe we should, but I'm not sure it's a reasonable expectation.
Compulsion or no, my friendships are not agenda based, and I treasure my friends ... all of them ... I'm somehow reminded of having once been told of someone's disappointment in my liking folks who didn't like them ... 'twas the wrong thing to say! ...I talk a lot about mirrors and self-portraits ... the perception that others have is one thing, how we see ourselves is another. The notion of mirrors and self-portraits ... seemed rather easy to grasp ... but, when you try to grab hold of it, things just ain't as simple as they might seem, ... danged if some self-portraits aren't almost photographic in their reproduction while some mirrors give distorted renderings of reality. It's not enough to just use any old mirrors for reflection ... they must be of the right stuff and kind.
I talk a lot about things of which I know nothing too, but if I didn't, I wouldn't have anything to say ... it's another thing that differentiates John from most methinks ...
His ability to reflect and look deep down inside ... and to be honest with himself ... is rare ... at least my experience has been that most either cannot or are unwilling to so do ... it is not coincidence that Polonius, a secondary character, is among the best remembered of the Bard's creations ... for his advice to Laertes ... to thine own self be true ...
Most of us hear it ... then knowingly nod, hardly giving it another thought ... but, nothing much compares with it's profundity ...
Why? Methinks it's because of recognition, not only of it's importance, but also it's rarity as an innate quality ... and for those who try, the difficulty lies within it's effecting ...
I'm envious ... true blue and foursquare John .. who knows himself so well ... it's that for which I strive but fail ...
It's true that I sometimes take license when referring to Mama ... but, my mother is the picture I try to paint ... she admonished me, it seems like 10,000 times, when I articulated my weaknesses, limitations and faults ... that's my boy you're talking about ... careful what you say! ... She did more than that when others joined in and articulated my weaknesses, limitations and faults! ...
This was my perception of true blue and foursquare John ... but after so writing and reflecting, I'm not sure that I can answer the question ... but it was rather obvious that he was something other than how he was being perceived ... that he was honest, consistent and opposed to apathy was the impression I then shared with others. But, I can assure you that I am sure that he is that ... that, and oh so much more! ...
John's my friend, Jimmy too ... so careful what you say! ...
Mother knew Polonius ... and agreed with him too ... though she would loan anyone in need anything she had, without expectation of it being returned, including money. Like Houseman's wisdom ... Mama's words weren't truly appreciated until long after they were received .. though they were the topic of frequent discussion ...
Being true to yourself ... knowing yourself .. the individual behind the many masks ... it's a rare gift, perhaps the rarest of all .. the trick methinks, is knowing how to use it ...
Knowing who and what we are ... recognizing our limitations ... shortcomings ... and weaknesses ... that's power that the majority of humanity does not possess. Unfortunately, those few so gifted frequently turn it into a liability rather than an asset. They allow the realization of their limitations ... shortcomings ... weaknesses ... and past failures or rejections to give them fear of failure rather than confidence in success as it should ... and when adversity is encountered, they see history repeating itself ... oftentimes giving up in frustration rather than defining and addressing the problems ...
Those who confuse self-portraits with mirrors admire themselves and blindly go forth with total confidence, for they believe they possess all the answers, usually surrounding themselves with non-threatening, kindred spirits ... they are the truly enlightened! ...
Say it ain't so Joe! ...
Mother knew Polonius ... and agreed with him too ... though she would loan anyone in need anything she had, without expectation of it being returned, including money. Like Houseman's wisdom ... Mama's words weren't truly appreciated until long after they were received .. though they were the topic of frequent discussion ...
Being true to yourself ... knowing yourself .. the individual behind the many masks ... it's a rare gift, perhaps the rarest of all .. the trick methinks, is knowing how to use it ...
Knowing who and what we are ... recognizing our limitations ... shortcomings ... and weaknesses ... that's power that the majority of humanity does not possess. Unfortunately, those few so gifted frequently turn it into a liability rather than an asset. They allow the realization of their limitations ... shortcomings ... weaknesses ... and past failures or rejections to give them fear of failure rather than confidence in success as it should ... and when adversity is encountered, they see history repeating itself ... oftentimes giving up in frustration rather than defining and addressing the problems ...
Those who confuse self-portraits with mirrors admire themselves and blindly go forth with total confidence, for they believe they possess all the answers, usually surrounding themselves with non-threatening, kindred spirits ... they are the truly enlightened! ...
Say it ain't so Joe! ...Back to the trick ...
Thanks to Prince Albert Gore's invention ...
that which he purloined from Vinton Cerf methinks ... everyone has a potential audience of millions ... nay, billions I say ... and with such potential, folks can easily get disciples and a flock, no matter what it is they're preaching ...
Polonius ... Mama ... Jesus Christ ... and the Dalai Lama too ... they each said ... to thine own self be true! In plain talk, don't apostatize! Mama's admonishment was out of concern that I would allow critical self-evaluation to undermine my self-confidence, thus preventing me from being all that I could be ... and though I protested, methinks her concerns were probably well justified ... just think, I coulda been a contender ... I coulda been somebody!
I'm uncertain of where I was going and not really sure of where I've been ... but here we are, right back where we started again ... Yes, "TheOldBarbershop" is about history too ... we are what we are as a result of our experiences ... history ... views ... interests ... memories ... stories ... decisions ... beliefs ... our likes and dislikes too ... all reflect our past history ... I hope others will share theirs with us ... in so doing, they'll be making history too ...
TheOldBarbershop is diverse from most ... or I would so hope ... if not, you can rest assured that's it's soon going to be. "No Free Hair Cuts Here" ... well, maybe one or two, but everybody carries his weight ... but our sign, all polished up and ready to be hung, is the one methinks Plato first so did, right here in the shop some 875,000 days ago, give or take a few ... "Let no unfair or unjust person enter."
No, we ain't replacing no mirrors ... though we're going to watch them close ...
and if you can't think geometrically, that's okay ... the three of us can't cut hair neither, were it not for the bowls, but as you can see ... it was that or jail for Jimmy, John and me! It's done wonders for us too ... I've slept at the Holiday Inn twice, methinks John's becoming more famous than Chill Wills and jimmy smith is now a serious contender for the Presidency!
Which one is which? ... Mr. Cranston ain't talking and my lips are sealed but now who do you think might have a whig to throw in the ring?
that which he purloined from Vinton Cerf methinks ... everyone has a potential audience of millions ... nay, billions I say ... and with such potential, folks can easily get disciples and a flock, no matter what it is they're preaching ...
Polonius ... Mama ... Jesus Christ ... and the Dalai Lama too ... they each said ... to thine own self be true! In plain talk, don't apostatize! Mama's admonishment was out of concern that I would allow critical self-evaluation to undermine my self-confidence, thus preventing me from being all that I could be ... and though I protested, methinks her concerns were probably well justified ... just think, I coulda been a contender ... I coulda been somebody!
I'm uncertain of where I was going and not really sure of where I've been ... but here we are, right back where we started again ... Yes, "TheOldBarbershop" is about history too ... we are what we are as a result of our experiences ... history ... views ... interests ... memories ... stories ... decisions ... beliefs ... our likes and dislikes too ... all reflect our past history ... I hope others will share theirs with us ... in so doing, they'll be making history too ...
TheOldBarbershop is diverse from most ... or I would so hope ... if not, you can rest assured that's it's soon going to be. "No Free Hair Cuts Here" ... well, maybe one or two, but everybody carries his weight ... but our sign, all polished up and ready to be hung, is the one methinks Plato first so did, right here in the shop some 875,000 days ago, give or take a few ... "Let no unfair or unjust person enter."
No, we ain't replacing no mirrors ... though we're going to watch them close ...
and if you can't think geometrically, that's okay ... the three of us can't cut hair neither, were it not for the bowls, but as you can see ... it was that or jail for Jimmy, John and me! It's done wonders for us too ... I've slept at the Holiday Inn twice, methinks John's becoming more famous than Chill Wills and jimmy smith is now a serious contender for the Presidency!
Which one is which? ... Mr. Cranston ain't talking and my lips are sealed but now who do you think might have a whig to throw in the ring?
We truly love baseball and our team(s) and that will always be on the agenda ... but for goodness sake, there are so many Braves' blogs already out there ...
and Tigers ... and Mets ... and Yankees ... and Cards ... and Orioles too, just to name a few ...
The Proprietor's vision is to feature a flow of diverse topics such as world affairs, politics, religion, tall tales, current events, true stories pertaining to actual life events and sports, including the Braves ... topics that aren't presently being discussed on most of the other sites, and those which may not be warmly welcomed on many others ... topics such as those you might find if you walked into an old barbershop on a busy Saturday morning ... just a friendly and lighthearted atmosphere, with everyone being equal ... simply a place where folks feel welcome and comfortable discussing whatever might be on their minds ... a place that ultimately stands on no other foundation than that of the strength of it's characters and quality of it's content ...
I strongly share and support this vision ... and while implementation will dynamically evolve, his original greeting was truly inspired ... "Welcome to "TheOldBarbershop" ... characters with character preferred, ladies too ... please take a seat and wait your turn ... leaf through a magazine or shoot the breeze with a friend ... when it's your turn in the barber's chair, be ready to share an interesting story, a tall tale or whatever is on your mind ... tips encouraged and appreciated ... no topic off-limits ... if you can't behave, use profanity, pick fights or spit on the floor you will politely be shown the door" ...
John's GrandDad ... Cato's Father ... Little Walter ... jimmy smith ... Blue Worms and Baby Seals ... Little HillBilly ... "Let no unfair or unjust person enter." That means we welcome all beliefs and points of view ... just keep it fair and keep it just ... that's a must! No free haircuts except on special occasions but the candy's always on the house!
No matter the grandiloquence, regardless the form ... this is what "TheOldBarbershop" is to me ... this is where my passion lies ... it's of little significance whether we have a multitude of visitors each day ... or just a few ... as one good friend said, "to thine own self be true, to hell with the naysayers!"
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Do you know me?
The intended purposes of this post are two fold ...
(1) give folks a better idea of how the layout works and why I'm interested in using it ... and
(2) to address my having requested help from the "Braves' Beat Blog" and "?Braves 'n Stuff", including the responses of Carolina Lady and Savannah Guy.
Although there are but the two "posts" shown here, "The Old Barbershop" aka "Plato's Place" ... and this one "The Request For Help", hopefully you can see that this format allows us to feature multiple posts at one time ... as many as we like(i.e. the earlier "The Grand Old Game" Post could have been 6 different posts) ... and you will note that the comments all go the same place ... facilitating our having several topics being discussed at the same time in the Barbershop ... consistent with our vision and toward which we're aiming ... much ado perhaps, but it's one of the reasons for us to use this format on occasion.
The Proprietor's Greeting lets folks know up front what we're about, and that for which we strive, and I hope those who choose to frequent the Shop will enjoy their visits, join in and help us make it the place that he envisioned.
Enjoy!
Shoes, Corns and Bunions ...
How many different shoe sizes are there? Hard to say, what with all the different systems and variances by manufacturer... but, it doesn't really matter, I say if the shoe fits, ... wear it!
One thing's for sure, for every size there are a whole bunch of folks wearing 'em ... problem is, footprints, like fingerprints are rather unique and as a result, a whole bunch of folks have corns and bunions too, Jimmy will vouch for that. If the shoe fits, ... then wear it, but do try it on first.
That's especially true for custom shoes ... what looks to be a perfect fit for us or someone we know, may have been designed for someone else ...
Tables are like shoes, methinks ... when I say table, some folks see a black maghogany, English Chippendale ... others, a walnut Sheraton ... or maybe a Hepplewhite, and no doubt some, a modern three legged thing, painted white with a glass top ... we see what we want to see, and sometimes what we don't. I once wrote a piece for the paper on Chippendale Furniture ... and, in order to meet the deadline, I called it in ... it caused quite a ruckus ... for everywhere I had said Chippendale, it read "Chip and Dale"
Modern Art is like shoes too ... lots of folks are quick to tell you what it means but 'bout the only one who really knows is the artist and they're usually dead ...
Shoes, tables, and art interpretation ... things with which one should not trifle ... unless you like corns and bunions.
I know,"there he goes agan" ... more recondite musings ...
No, it's just that private input from some of our friends of longstanding acquaintence seems to suggest that the much of the humor in my Post was pointed and directed at specifc individuals ... and that my intent and purpose lay within the onion layers. While that may appear to be the case ... and though my name isn't Joe, I was just telling you that it ain't so! ... and in the few cases where the humor is pointed, it's usually aimed at folks other than imagined.
Enjoy!
Fishing Holes ...
Without question, the Old Barbershop needs and would enjoy a broader audience and it's understandable that some have, and others will, concluded that my requesting assistance from the Braves Beat Blog and Braves 'n Stuff was for the purpose of advertising and promoting The Shop ... and pragmatically, that result may have to some extent been acheived.
Certainly it's common practice to advertise and promote blogs on Braves 'n Stuff, ... as others have so done but the old barbershop (this one, not the Academy) opted at the outset not to advertise on either ... didn't even publicly give out the URL ... and had never so done ... that's never ... choosing instead to directly contact those for whom we had, or were able to obtain, email addresses ... who we thought might enjoy the further scribblings of jjs, sja, and me ... or otherwise have an interest in staying in touch, inviting them to participate to the extent of their interest in so doing.
Some accepted the invitation, some declined, while others didn't respond ... and the converse is true ... all who were invited were folks with whom we thought we would enjoy blogging and/or staying in touch ... and still do. That's important to consider for had I not been made to feel uncomfortable and my presence unwanted by certain elements, I would still be actively blogging with the Carolina Lady.
There was and is no real reason to "advertise" on Braves 'n Stuff ... we truly do hope those friends will choose to frequent the shop on occasion, but simply put, we have no interest in seining a small pond what's done been fished ... and to continue to "advertise" to folks what's done been invited would be doing exactly that. Admittedly, there was possibly some marginal utility in so doing on The Beat Blog where we had many friends but few addresses ...
We think we're truly different from the other baseball blogs, or at least that's the vision ... roughly half of the posts cover something other than baseball and/or the Braves. We have a somewhat broader focus and as indicated in the "Grand Old Game" Post, ... we would like to attract new fish from other bodies of water. My recent request for assistance may have been ill conceived, but was exactly that... a request for help.
No, my interest was not in advertising there ... never did ... and didn't ... had that been our interest, our strategy would have been quite different ... to otherwise think is to not think, methinks. I'm told that the truth will set you free ... so will a corrupt jailer, if he get's his price ... best to rely on the truth ... and that's it.
Thanks! ...
In spite of the cavalier reception in some quarters, I've received a surprising level of relevant input, including some from unexpected sources ... and some good suggestions which will be given most serious consideration ... thanks to all who were kind enough to respond, including the cage rattler.
As a result, the videos should soon be performing properly in most browsers and you'll likely be seeing some changes effected in the format ... perhaps in the fare as well. Lest it gets lost in all my musings ... we have no interest in competing with anyone for audience and there will be no prostitution of the vision for that or any purpose.
Though we're flawed and may stumble from time to time, all characters of character are welcome, regardless of view ... a good Liberal is just as valued as a good Conservative ... perhaps even more so, based upon apparent supply ... goodness!
For those so looking, that's intended as humor ... the point is that each will be treated with respect, regardless of view, ... with the demands placed upon one, placed upon us all ... and we hope everyone enjoys their visits to the shop.
In response to one suggestion, those interested in presenting pieces for publication need but to contact me via email and the Author Search sidebar has been modified so as to facilitate that ... thanks!
I hope folks noticed the hot link back on page one and enjoyed Eddy Arnold's rendition of the song that he wrote ... selected for a variety of reasons. Methinks it explains shoes, tables, and art interpretation ... corns and bunions too; better than I ever could ... that is, if you'll click on "the thinker" ... on pages 2, 3, and 4.
Thanks again to everyone!
Time to more forward ... mushBirth of a Post ...
Regarding the shoes, tables, corns and bunions ... Mama never met a stranger nor anyone without some qualities she liked ... enabling her to be friends with most. I may not have inherited that as a trait but, I've had much the same experience and throughout my life, certain of my friends have had difficulty understanding how I could like those who didn't like them ... I guess it depends upon the basis of your friendships ... I've been referencing and explaining that since perhaps my third or fourth week's participation on the Braves' Beat blog ... privately and then publicly ... and more than once did it involve both of my current partners in crime, before any problems surfaced on that Blog ... and suggesting it should otherwise be, was always the wrong thing to say.
The post didn't start out as it finished, few things do. There were no references to Plato's Academy ... didn't even know what it was or else I had forgotten. I felt bad that such a heavy load had been placed upon John and Jimmy as a result of my limited participation ... and was attempting to express my appreciation of them and their creative talents in a second post, using the same format as the first.
I passed a first draft by John for his reaction which was typical John ... "it's fine but says too many nice things about me" ... and then proceeded to provide a critical evaluation of his work and his performance ... reminding me of Mama's "that's my boy, you're talking about, careful what you say" when I would do the same ... I changed it to "friend" and threw it back at him ... he laughed and it triggered a different direction for the post.
For some reason, I had trouble completing the post and on one occasion, told John of my difficulty ... saying that I was about ready to give up ... "All the great thoughts have done been thunk" ... he sent me a couple of photos, including "the thinker" ... I thought it made a great opening line and it triggered the thought of including the applet of great thinkers ... but, when I began testing, it wouldn't load on certain systems, including John's ... so I need a different first page ... Carol was helping and in her search for pictures of the great thinkers, she found the picture depicting Plato's Academy ... something, with which I was unfamiliar ... but in looking at it and reading the document from which it came, my mind turned it into a barbershop because it was obvious that them boys needed haircuts and shaves ... and while I was unfamiliar with all but a couple of the referenced names, they became my barbers ... and so the story took shape ... needed something for that first page so that folks wouldn't get locked out of the Shop without options.
The 3 Stooges is how I sometimes think of the three of us, ... not sure if it was John or Jimmy who first made the connection, or perhaps someone else ... but when I saw the poster at my favorite BBQ haunt, I knew it had to be included along with the great thinkers ... but its size suggested other use and I substituted my father's picture instead.
It was a lark ... once the vehicle started rolling ... and as many from our current audience know us only through the Blogs, I suppose the trip does travel down familiar roads ... but hopefully, folks will find it humorous, with the original purpose held in tact ... I put John and Jimmy in the class of "Babe", the "Georgia Peach", and the "The Big Train" ... some boys are just better than others.
There's hair to be cut, beards to be trimmed, shaves to be given and shoes to be shined ...
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Humor
Mare Humorum
The cool fall air tells me that it won't be long before the old pot-belly stove will glow with the warmth of firewood and good conversation. The old boys will gather 'round and tell stories that fit the season or fit their mood.
They'll reminisce about the past -- bestowing sainthood on their departed loved ones -- and complain about the relatives they still have. Let me pull up a chair and tell you one too -- it happened forty-five years ago this Christmas.
My father was a strict disciplinarian with a dry wit and an odd, comedic attraction to eye brow pencils. My Uncle Gordon, a long time bachelor and great gift-giver, showered me with all things scientific: chemistry sets, water-powered rockets, microscopes, ant farms, and for Christmas 1963, a thirty inch, Tasco refractor telescope with its own tripod. I would stand for hours in the winter cold
looking at the moon, on the off-chance I would see an alien landing or make some other noteworthy scientific discovery.
I’d had the $39.95 “precision optical instrument” for less than a week when, one evening, my dad opened the front door and ordered me to come inside, it was time for bed. I kept asking for just ten more minutes to survey the pock-marked region of Mare Humorum, the dark dimple on the left lower jaw of the man in the moon; it looked suspiciously like an alien rendezvous spot to me. But, Daddy told me it wasn’t safe outside in the dark at the unseemly hour of nine o’clock. Things happen to children, alone at night, especially when they ignore their parents and stare at the moon.
You better come inside, before some lunatic gets you,” he warned.
But, knowing that my father was a chronic worrier I wasn’t too concerned about roving child molesters in our front yard. As I continued to quietly gaze at the surface of the moon, lost in the Sea of Tranquility, I heard faint footsteps at the end of our driveway.
I figured it was my dad, probably come to drag me inside.
I glanced up and casually put my eye back to the eyepiece. “Oh, it’s only you,” I said.
Then it dawned on me: my father was in the house and this man had an overcoat on with the collar turned up, and a felt hat drawn down over his eyes. Something wasn’t right. I bolted up and on closer inspection it definitely wasn’t my dad, it was a strange Chinese man with a thin, black Fu Manchu mustache, black slits at the corners of his eyes, and a menacing, almost maniacal smile.
I yelled, “THAT’S NOT YOU!” and hurled my brand new, genuine Tasco 350 x 50mm refractory telescope with 2x Barlow lens, removable eyepiece, and sturdy aluminum alloy tripod at what appeared to be Charlie Chan in theatrical makeup.
I ran, screaming hysterically, into the house and didn’t stop until I was hiding under the dining room table, shaking in stunned disbelief that a lunatic really was after me. Mr. Chan chased me in the front door and stood over me as I cowered at his feet with my eyes shut, wondering where my parents were to save me. But, when I finally calmed down enough to face my fears, there was Daddy holding the shattered pieces of my new, now broken telescope, sporting more eyebrow pencil than a Mary Kay representative.
“I told you somebody might get you,” Daddy said. “Next time you’ll listen.
I didn’t see the Humorum in that, or anything else through that telescope, after my dad’s brush with an eyebrow pencil.
David ...
They'll reminisce about the past -- bestowing sainthood on their departed loved ones -- and complain about the relatives they still have. Let me pull up a chair and tell you one too -- it happened forty-five years ago this Christmas.
My father was a strict disciplinarian with a dry wit and an odd, comedic attraction to eye brow pencils. My Uncle Gordon, a long time bachelor and great gift-giver, showered me with all things scientific: chemistry sets, water-powered rockets, microscopes, ant farms, and for Christmas 1963, a thirty inch, Tasco refractor telescope with its own tripod. I would stand for hours in the winter cold
looking at the moon, on the off-chance I would see an alien landing or make some other noteworthy scientific discovery.
I’d had the $39.95 “precision optical instrument” for less than a week when, one evening, my dad opened the front door and ordered me to come inside, it was time for bed. I kept asking for just ten more minutes to survey the pock-marked region of Mare Humorum, the dark dimple on the left lower jaw of the man in the moon; it looked suspiciously like an alien rendezvous spot to me. But, Daddy told me it wasn’t safe outside in the dark at the unseemly hour of nine o’clock. Things happen to children, alone at night, especially when they ignore their parents and stare at the moon.
You better come inside, before some lunatic gets you,” he warned.
But, knowing that my father was a chronic worrier I wasn’t too concerned about roving child molesters in our front yard. As I continued to quietly gaze at the surface of the moon, lost in the Sea of Tranquility, I heard faint footsteps at the end of our driveway.
I figured it was my dad, probably come to drag me inside.
I glanced up and casually put my eye back to the eyepiece. “Oh, it’s only you,” I said.
Then it dawned on me: my father was in the house and this man had an overcoat on with the collar turned up, and a felt hat drawn down over his eyes. Something wasn’t right. I bolted up and on closer inspection it definitely wasn’t my dad, it was a strange Chinese man with a thin, black Fu Manchu mustache, black slits at the corners of his eyes, and a menacing, almost maniacal smile.
I yelled, “THAT’S NOT YOU!” and hurled my brand new, genuine Tasco 350 x 50mm refractory telescope with 2x Barlow lens, removable eyepiece, and sturdy aluminum alloy tripod at what appeared to be Charlie Chan in theatrical makeup.
I ran, screaming hysterically, into the house and didn’t stop until I was hiding under the dining room table, shaking in stunned disbelief that a lunatic really was after me. Mr. Chan chased me in the front door and stood over me as I cowered at his feet with my eyes shut, wondering where my parents were to save me. But, when I finally calmed down enough to face my fears, there was Daddy holding the shattered pieces of my new, now broken telescope, sporting more eyebrow pencil than a Mary Kay representative.
“I told you somebody might get you,” Daddy said. “Next time you’ll listen.
I didn’t see the Humorum in that, or anything else through that telescope, after my dad’s brush with an eyebrow pencil.
David ...
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"TheOldBarbershop" - created along the lines of the old barbershops, same but different, where folks would gather to visit with friends - share life experiences - tall tales - or maybe discuss politics, religion, sports, news, weather, current affairs or just about anything interesting or imaginable
We thought it might be good to tell folks a bit about the old barbershop, its history and its barbers ... somehow I got elected ... that's another way of saying that the Southern Jackass is a whole bunch bigger than me!Miss Carol says I'm an old rambling wreck from Georgia Tech ... and all four are true, but I ain't no engineer! It ain't by intent that I ramble but as you'll see, it takes me four pages to write what others do in less than one ... advance sincere apologies!
If you've read our story then
That's right, Plato's Place was a barbering school ... that's why some folks called it
Yes, I misuse and abuse this language I love ... 
Nobody knows what Jimmy really looks like, at least until now ... he can say more with a couple of words and a picture than most of us can in two or three pages ... you'll find proof positive on the walls of the Shop and his frequent comments!
There you'll also find his ward and our favorite columnist,
In the Shop, I talk a lot about mirrors and self-portraits ... the perception that others have is one thing, how we see ourselves is another. The notion of mirrors and self-portraits ... seemed rather easy to grasp ... but, when you try to grab hold of it, things just ain't as simple as they might seem, ... danged if some self-portraits aren't almost photographic in their reproduction while some mirrors give distorted renderings of reality. It's not enough to just use any old mirrors for reflection ... they must be of the right stuff and kind.
I talk a lot about things of which I know nothing too, but if I didn't, I wouldn't have anything to say ... it's another thing that differentiates SJA and JJS from most methinks ...
SJA's ability to reflect and look deep down inside ... and to be honest with himself ... is rare ... at least my experience has been that most either cannot or are unwilling to so do ... it is not just coincidence or happenstance that
We've been truly blessed to add first
inspired ... and it's one thing that won't ... "

